Did Abroad Actually Change Me?

I knew that I wanted to study abroad when I started my college experience at Tulane. I couldn’t wait for the amazing experiences that I was going to have, the friends I was going to make, and the places that I would see. August rolled around, I packed my bags, and set off to have the adventure of a lifetime. I arrived in Copenhagen, Denmark and unpacked my things. It quickly set in that I wasn’t home anymore. I was in a foreign country with no understanding of what my semester was going to look like. Everything is new! The food, transportation, culture, people, it was all unknown! Although that is invigorating, it’s also terrifying. For the first couple of weeks, I felt confused, overwhelmed, and thought that I was the only one experiencing this. Spoiler Alert! Everyone is nervous, confused, and overwhelmed, even if it doesn’t seem like it.

The pressures we put on ourselves to have an “abroad changed me” experience can be immense. Before going abroad, I dreamed up how my semester was going to go. I expected myself to be settled and adjust quickly, but that was unrealistic. No one moves to a different country and is living their best life two weeks later! That was a tough pill to swallow, unrealistic as it was. When I realized that my allotted adjustment period was going to take longer than anticipated, I had to learn how to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Studying abroad is full of amazing experiences, but in order to live this experience to the fullest, you have to jump right in not knowing what is ahead. No matter how detailed I made a weekend trip itinerary, I never knew what the future would look like until I was in it. No matter how badly I want to predict the future I can’t, and I learned that creating an expectation for an unknown future only sets you up for failure. Because I now know this, I have become more comfortable with the unknown and have an easier time rolling with the punches.

Living in Copenhagen also made me so much more comfortable being with myself. At Tulane, I refused to do anything alone. I was never truly alone for an extended period of time between being in class, having roommates, and living on campus. When I was abroad, this changed. The city and its people were unfamiliar. Because of this, I made a conscious effort to do things out of my comfort zone, one of which was being alone. I went on a breakfast date by myself, did solo shopping trips, and took time out of my day to check in and ask myself how I was doing in the fast-paced, constantly changing experience that is being abroad. This allowed me to learn so much more about myself and what makes me, me. I learned more about what I like and want to do, and that I am in great company just being with myself. I have brought this back to school with me through taking Audubon walks while listening to my favorite podcast and reading. It sounds simple, enjoying being by yourself, but I think this is easier said than done. It is hard to take a step away from the chaos and fun, but it has truly allowed me to think about myself and what I need, which is an incredibly valuable lesson I will continue to carry with me.

So…did abroad actually change me? I don’t know if it did, but it gave me the space to realize that I can’t see into the future and I can not judge myself for that. Most importantly, it gave me the opportunity to start to understand myself and who I want to be in my young adult life…and I can’t wait to see what is in store.