Sex is different for everyone based on their sexual preferences, orientation, and experience levels. This is because sex is not only about becoming intimate with a partner, but also about getting to know oneself as a sexual being. One of the many ways to experiment with sex and to find out the best way to create a positive sexual experience for yourself is by integrating certain sexual aids into your experience, such as sex toys, vibrators, lubricant, and other sex-play devices. It can be difficult to navigate the world of sex toys to find the best fit for you, so here is a small guide to help get you started on the right path.
First, let’s talk about lube! Lube is a sexual device that is often neglected, but can make a WORLD of a difference to individuals who have trouble becoming stimulated or for those of you who tense up during sex. Let’s be real here–sex can be uncomfortable at times, and it can take a lot of mind control to get our bodies to relax, especially with a new partner. This is where lube comes into play: lubricant not only makes sex easier anatomically, but it can also reduce inflammation and swelling to prevent pain and irritation. There are different types of lubes, so it’s important to know which kind you are dealing with. For example, water-based lubricants are the most common type of lube, and you can use them with both latex and non-latex condoms. However, oil-based lubricants can increase the risk of a ripped or torn condom, so be sure you get the right kind! Lube can also come in different variations: it can be scented, flavored, or even CBD infused. If you are interested in changing up sex but are new to the world of sex toys, lube is the perfect beginner way to experiment with your experience.
Heterosexual sex is often male-centered, so introducing a vibrator targeted at female pleasure can be a valuable tool for improving your sexual experience. One of the most simple yet effective vibrators during sex is the bullet, which is a small yet powerful vibrator for clitoral stimulation–a form of stimulation often neglected during penetrative sex (available for purchase at “Dynamo” sex shop in New Orleans). If you’re not comfortable with introducing a vibrator in the bedroom, this type of toy is also equally effective for personal use. Vibrators come in all different shapes and sizes and can be useful in getting to know your own body, so that you can later on guide your partner and improve your own sexual experience.
Another factor to keep in mind is the type of dynamic that makes you feel the most sexy/powerful/comfortable version of yourself during sex. For example, some people may feel the most empowered when taking on a submissive role in the bedroom. These people may enjoy introducing handcuffs or other bondage devices into the bedroom to spice up their sexual experience. While on the other hand, people who take on a dominant or neutral role during sex may be more likely to introduce toys such as vibrators into the bedroom, which give them more control over the experience. Either way, it’s okay to try something out and realize that it’s not working for your particular sexual preferences–as long as you and your partner communicate about what works and what doesn’t, you are on the path to positive sexual growth.
For some people, sex toys may be the perfect way to spice up a relationship and become more intimate with your S.O. However, other people may find sex toys to be intrusive and distracting from the raw physical relationship between two individuals. This is perfectly normal–you can experiment with sex and find out what works best for you without any material aid and still have just as positive of an experience; its simply about trying out new things and not being afraid to communicate with your partner about what works/doesn’t work for you! Also, always remember to establish clear consent when introducing new toys and activities into the bedroom, because not all people are comfortable with the same things that you may be comfortable with. The next time you and your partner are getting fun and flirty in the bedroom, consider trying out some of these new tricks and tools for spicing up your sexual experience!
Cover Photo: Smile Makers Collective