No matter how you spent your first semester, whether it be going to Rome, Rome, or Rome, I’m sure there are some parts of Tulane that still confuse you. Because I’m obviously completely immersed in Tulane culture after one whole semester of being here, I thought I would give you, newbie, some advice.
When it comes to campus life, you must smile at every TUSTEP dog you see, even if neither the owner nor the dog sees you. Send that good energy onto campus. Number four happiest students, am I right? Along with that, I’m sure you have seen all of the McAlister tablers. It is your duty as a Tulanian to ignore them as much as you can unless they unwillingly give you a flyer. In which case hold onto that flyer because it’s rude to throw it out in front of them. I don’t make the rules.
As you might’ve gathered by now, Tulane is a “bar school.” On Wednesdays, we go to Bruno’s for Wine Wednesday. Just like if you want to save money on car insurance, you go to Geico. It’s just what you do. The Boot, of course, is a staple for us Tulanians. You will definitely know someone there no matter the day of the week or the time of day. Now if you already knew that, here’s another crucial place to know: “The Boot Bathroom.” This is an area for a quick escape from The Boot. If you’re a girl, here you will find the nicest, prettiest girls, with like, the most amazing shirt ever, and like, oh my god, don’t even get me started, I’ve met Jake before and he so does not deserve you!!!
If you couldn’t tell, Tulane is a top party school (we got knocked down from number one but that can be our little secret). You definitely think — because of all of the valid Instagram representation — that you will always have to party. But in reality, if you don’t go out one night, it’s okay! Take some time for yourself. Just don’t expect a social life or even one friend after you pull that shit.
Now for one last bonus tip before I send you off, my beautiful dove, get yourself a hype girl. Or a hype boy. Or a hype llama. Honestly, whatever you want. But if you want to make it through the hard days (spoiler alert: they happen all the time), you need a person. Once you find that person, well, you’re pretty much set. With all of this in mind, newbie, I hope you enjoy your stay here at Tulane University.
Cover Photo: Ayelet Blumovitz