Some of us have a hard time seeing the red flags, even when they’re right in front of us. We’re here to tell you that if these particular indicators keep popping up, girl get out!!
1. He only texts you after the ripe hour of 10pm
Common douchey phrases such as “wyd” and “wya” are good indicators that getting to know your personality isn’t really the point of the conversation. One word responses also fall into this category. General rule: if he isn’t spending time and effort into formulating text messages to you, then you probably shouldn’t either.
2. He’s slept with one or several of your friends
If you tell your friends about a new boy that you’ve been seeing and their first responses are “oh yeah, I’ve gotten with him” or “I know someone who has gotten with him,” then you may want to do some further sleuthing on his reputation. Some players are smart and realize that they shouldn’t hook up with multiple girls who are friends with one another… most aren’t. Now, some boy overlap can be okay between friends, but if a guy has slept with most of your friends before getting to you then you might want to pass on being his next conquest.
3. When you talk to him in public he tries to run away
Different people have different approaches to handling a public encounter with a former hook up. Some choose confrontation, some choose casual wave, and others resort to complete avoidance. Either way, if you end up starting a conversation with a guy in public, there are clear signs that tell you whether or not he’s interested. For example, if he’s standing close to you and asking you follow up questions, then he’s feeling the conversation. If he’s standing a solid three feet away from you and keeps looking over his shoulder, he’s probably itching to get out of the conversation as soon as possible. If he’s slowly backing away from you or quickens his pace as he passes, then you should probably run in the other direction.
4. He says he’s going to the bathroom and then hooks up with
another girl across the room
This example may sound a bit extreme (although it is based on true events) but you’d be surprised by how many guys go for multiple girls in one night in order to guarantee a late-night hook up. If you see that a guy you’ve been talking to is sending the same flirty signals to other girls at a party, then chances are he’s scheming both of you at the same time. Players are always looking for some back-up options. Or, even worse, he’s regularly seeing multiple girls at once and is trying to decide which one to take home that night. Sounds like an STD alert to me.
5. He tells you to “roll” to his darty but doesn’t talk to you once you
Guys do this all the time. They make a “plan” with you to see you at a darty/party/social gathering, whatever, to keep you thinking that you’re special to them. While this is sometimes the case (and it very well could be), a player understands that they have no inclination to talk to you at the party and can easily seem too busy or too drunk to have a real conversation. The player always keeps his options open — he can’t be seen with just one girl at a party. So if a guy invites you to a party and then treats you like you’re second-rate, make sure that your options are open too.
6. He straight up ghosts you with the excuse “I was outtie”
Both guys and girls alike are in denial about the fact that they have both ghosted and been ghosted by at least one person in their lives. You may be thinking to yourself, “Oh, I know when I’ve been ghosted” or “If a guy ghosted me I would never go back to him,” but I’m willing to bet that most girls out there have made excuses for guys that they liked to feel less guilty about going back to a ghoster. Common excuses made by ghosters include “I was busy with school,” or “I never saw your texts,” or “I was just soooo drunk.” KNOW THE SIGNS. Once a ghoster, always a ghoster! Oh, and if he doesn’t even bother to make excuses, don’t go back to him when his drunk ass begs to come home with you at the end of the night.
BONUS: You find another girl’s underwear in his bed
Yes! This happened! Don’t let this be a strike one, this is an automatic strike three on the playing field.
BONUS BONUS: He invites you over and another girl is already there
If you’re not his #1 choice, then he shouldn’t be yours. And if his number one choice last minute SHOWS UP to YOUR plans, then he shouldn’t even be a choice in the first place.
Stay safe out their ladies.
Cover Photo: Bianca Falanga